


no room at all for any other thought

by Murf1307



Category: Ghostfacers - Fandom, Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Coffee, Coming Out, Corbett's Alive, Developing Relationship, First Kiss, French Vanilla Coffee, Haunted Houses, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, The Ghostfacers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-09
Packaged: 2018-04-03 16:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4107787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Murf1307/pseuds/Murf1307
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a haunted house in the Midwest, Ed comes to terms with some things while Corbett sleeps on his shoulder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	no room at all for any other thought

**Author's Note:**

> 90% of this fic was written with [Recessional by Vienna Teng](youtube.com/watch/?v=AGKicxfFtsw#Vienna_Teng_-_Recessional) on repeat, and the other 10% was written with a bunch of Lesley Gore songs (like the ship-relevant "It's My Party (And I'll Cry If I Want To)").

_There’s a reason not to want this —_  
_but I forgot._  
— “Recessional” by Vienna Teng

  
It’s just a moment, a small little moment, in a dark room in the middle of the night.  The others are in other rooms of this sprawling Midwestern house, doing their thing.  
  
And Corbett’s fallen asleep.  Ed watches him, not paying so much attention to the instruments anymore, despite the fact that he should.  But Corbett’s hair is flopping over his forehead, and his chest is rising and falling, and Ed can’t help but think about how much of a miracle that is.  
  
The Morton House had been _awful._   Corbett had only barely managed to get out before the ghost of Freeman Dagget could shove a pipe through his throat.  There’s a scar on the back of his neck where it broke skin, and Ed almost chokes every time he sees it.  
  
But Corbett’s still here, still breathing, and Ed can’t possibly be more thankful for that.  
  
Corbett’s smiling a little in his sleep, corner of his mouth tipped up.  Ed hopes he’s dreaming something nice.  
  
Technically, he should wake him.  The cameras are rolling, after all.  And things could be happening.  But Ed’s too caught up in the moment to care.  
  
There are reasons he’s not going to go into, reasons to pretend that this moment _isn’t_  happening.  And he’ll pretend, in the morning, and he’ll pretend when Spruce and Maggie go through the footage, because he can’t do anything  _but pretend_  that this isn’t real.  
  
But right now, he’s sitting here, watching Corbett sleep, watching the rise and fall of his chest, and feeling something he doesn’t want to put a name to for fear of _making_ it real.  
  
Corbett wakes up on his own after a moment or two longer, blinking his brown eyes at Ed.  “Ed?” he murmurs, then wakes up all the way.  “Oh, gosh, I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” he says, nervous.  
  
“Nah, man, it’s fine,” Ed says, smiling a little.    
  
“Oh,” Corbett says, surprised.  He blushes a little.  “Do you need anything?”  
  
Ed shakes his head.  “No, I’m good.  You need a good night’s sleep, though.  Boss’s orders, you sleep well tomorrow, all right?”  
  
Corbett laughs a little.  “Okay, okay.”  
  
“Are you — are you okay?”  It’s an awkward question, he knows.  “I mean, this is the first mission we’ve had get this far since…you know.”  
  
“I’m okay,” Corbett says, nodding.  He looks a little solemn, though.  “I…I didn’t really sleep well last night.  I was nervous.  But now I’m okay, I think.”  He shrugs.  “What about you?  You seemed, um, you seemed really upset about it, when it happened.”  
  
“I’m okay,” Ed echoes.  “Honest, I am.”  
  
“Okay, that’s good.”  
  
Ed glances at the instruments.  “This room’s been kind of a dud all night.”  He’s thankful for that, actually, even though he shouldn’t be.    
  
“Yeah, that’s probably why I fell asleep.”  Corbett’s smiling again.    
  
“Am I not engaging company?” Ed asks, mock-scandalized.  
  
Corbett laughs, and he’s blushing again.  “You’re very engaging, but the lack of activity and the fact I didn’t really sleep last night make for a pretty sleepy me.”  
  
Ed grins at him, chuckling a little.  “Well, I didn’t mind,” he says, and it comes out softer than he means it to.  He glances down, at the EMF reader.  Still nothing.  
  
“That’s — good,” Corbett’s response is just as quiet.  He gets up from the chair against the wall to join Ed by the instruments.  “Still nothing?”  
  
“Still nothing.”  
  
“All right.”  Corbett nods.  “You sure you don’t need anything?”  
  
“Why?  You goin’ somewhere?”  Ed’s a little wary — he hardly wants to let Corbett out of his sight in daylight these days, much less let him wander around a haunted house alone at night.  
  
Corbett shrugs.  “It’s that or falling asleep again, I think.”  
  
“Maybe you should sleep.”  
  
That’s the moment when Corbett gets it, and his eyes widen a little.  “Ed, I’ll be fine.”  
  
“You don’t know that.  We thought the Morton House —“  
  
“You didn’t know.  It wasn’t in any of the research we had available to us.  It’s not your fault you didn’t think to look at obituaries.  That’s not our job.”  Corbett’s firm on that.  “We’re not like those guys.  We’re not even supposed to be like those guys.”  
  
Ed shakes his head.  “You almost _died_ , Corbett.”  
  
“I know that.  I also know that you spent like three all-nighters searching for every single piece of information you could about this place, _including_  checking the obituaries.”  Corbett frowns thunderously.  “I’ll be fine.”  
  
It makes Ed flinch.  “Who told you that?”  
  
“Maggie.  She said you were complaining because she can’t make coffee like I can.”  
  
Ed flushes, half in anger and half in embarrassment.  “Well, in my defense, you’re _really_  good at coffee.”  
  
“You’ve been freaking out since that night.  Everyone else is okay, but not you.  Why?”  Corbett says it quietly, like he doesn’t want Ed to freak out more.  
  
He looks away.  “If — if you’d died that night, it would’ve been my fault.  I brought everyone there on faulty, incomplete information, and you almost died because of it.  I really can’t handle something like that.”  
  
Corbett shifts closer, brow furrowing.  He looks worried now.  “Is it okay if I hug you?”  
  
Ed looks at him and nods, swallowing.  “Yeah, sure.”  
  
He sinks into the hug when Corbett wraps his arms around him.  It feels like some of the anxiety that’s been plaguing him since that night suddenly lifts, and he curls his arms around Corbett’s waist in turn. It’s an awkward position, sure, Ed twisted around so that he can hug back, Corbett’s head resting on his shoulder.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Corbett murmurs.  “I know I shouldn’t’ve wandered off alone.  It wasn’t all your fault, Ed.  You don’t deserve to feel like this.”  
  
Ed swallows again, and he’s trying not to cry.  “I feel like I’m gonna fuck it up, because I always do.”  
  
Corbett pulls back a little, settling his hands on his shoulders and looking Ed straight in the eye.  “You won’t.  This is the thing you’ve always wanted to do, right?  Show people the truth about the paranormal?”  
  
“Yeah.  It is.  Ever since I was a kid, really.  Since, y’know, Starfleet wasn’t an option.”  It’s a shaky joke at best, but he’s trying to distract himself from the fact that they’re still so close — his arms are still looped loosely around Corbett’s waist, after all.  
  
“And you have your team, right?  You’ve got Harry, and Maggie, and Spruce, and me.  So it’s not like you have to do any of this alone.”  Corbett’s focused, and serious, and he squeezes Ed’s shoulders.  
  
“R-right,” Ed murmurs.    
  
Corbett nods.  “So even if you do mess up, we’re here to fix it.  We’re your backup.”  
  
Ed nods, carefully.  “Yeah.”  
  
“So let us do our jobs, yeah?  Because you’ve done way more than you’ve had to for yours.”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
Corbett takes his hands back, and Ed lets go of him in turn.  His fingers twitch, almost reaching for him again, heart thudding a little harder against his ribs.  
  
“I’m gonna go take a walk, okay?  There’s a coffeemaker down in the kitchen.  Do you want me to bring you back some?”  Corbett’s being so careful, and Ed’s chest hurts at that.  
  
He nods.  “Okay.  Okay.”  
  
Corbett nods at him and gets up.  Ed watches him go, trying not to shiver too visibly.  
  
He swallows, turns back to the EMF readers and monitors, and he waits.    
  
The waiting’s the worst part, because even though there’s a camera in the kitchen and he can _see_  Corbett making the coffee, there’s nothing he can _do_  if something happens.  
  
He’s shaking, and it’s more than guilt, more than fear.  There’s a lump in his throat that he can’t swallow down, and he jiggles his leg to get rid of the excess energy, the adrenaline that, by rights, shouldn’t be pumping through him.    
  
He gets a text from Harry.  He ignores it, but flinches anyway.  
  
Harry’s one of the reasons he can’t do this.  Harry doesn’t know anything, but he keeps implying stuff about Corbett, and it makes Ed want to puke, because if Harry’s saying this stuff about _Corbett,_  he can’t imagine what it’ll be like if he finds out —   
  
No, there’s nothing to find out.  There _isn’t_.  There is nothing to find out.  
  
There’s nothing to find out.  
  
Corbett takes the coffee out of the machine, pouring it into two mugs and smiling at the camera.  They don’t have a mic in the kitchen, because there’s no reported activity there.    
  
Ed waits, afraid, as Corbett leaves the scope of the camera.  The moments stretch on, but Corbett comes back, leaning against the doorframe.  “Hey.  You okay?”  
  
“Yeah,” Ed manages.  
  
Corbett smiles at him again and hands him a mug.  “No activity?”  
  
“No activity.”  Ed looks up as Corbett sits down next to him, warming his hands on his coffee mug.    
  
“What are we gonna do to pass the time, then?”  
  
Ed shrugs.  “Dunno.  You got any ideas?”  
  
“I don’t know.  Maybe we could talk about something?”  Corbett shrugs as well.  “Are you into comics?”  
  
“Not really,” Ed admits.  “I don’t know a lot.  Seems kind of complicated to get into.”    
  
Corbett smiles a little, snorting a bit.  “Yeah, it can be intimidating for new people.  I, um, I’ve been reading them since I was little, so it’s just sort of always been something I kept up with.  I’m a big X-Men fan, actually.”  
  
“I saw the movies for that.  They were pretty good.”  Ed shrugs a little.  “I liked Cyclops.”  
  
“Me too, they got him really right in the movie.  They messed up Jean a lot, but the comics do that too.  It’s like they only bring her back to kill her off so that they can make the men who love her sad.”  Corbett rolls his eyes.  “It cheapens her story a lot, I think.”  
  
Ed watches him.  “Yeah?  What else about the comics are you into?”  
  
“Well, there’s this really interesting storyline going on right now, Cyclops is trying to establish a mutant stronghold, because a few years ago, the Scarlet Witch depowered most of the mutants on the planet, and now mutants are kind of an endangered species.  It’s pretty scary, to be honest.”  Corbett smiles at him.  “I, uh, really relate to the mutants, actually.”  
  
“What, are you gonna tell me you have superpowers?”  Ed raises an eyebrow.  
  
Corbett blushes.  “No, um, it’s not really that cool.  I just — well.”  He looks away.  
  
“You just what?” Ed asks, biting his lip.    
  
“I’m gay.”  Corbett shifts sideways, away from Ed, looking down and biting his own lip.  
  
Ed shrugs, trying to hide the swoop of hope in his gut, because no.  No.  There is nothing there.   _Nothing there._   “Oh.  Okay.”  
  
Corbett looks at him.  “That doesn’t freak you out?”  
  
“Corbett, I’m kind of a jerk, but I’m not _that much_  of a jerk.”  He shrugs again.  “So no, I’m not freaked out.”  
  
It’s totally okay if Corbett’s gay, because that has nothing to do with him.  
  
“That’s good.  I — I was kind of worried, you know.  Harry’s kind of…y’know?”  Corbett winces a little.  
  
“Yeah, he’s definitely kind of that kind of jerk.”  Ed bites the inside of his cheek.  “D’you want me to talk to him about it?  Because if he’s making you uncomfortable —“  
  
Corbett shakes his head, blushing.  “No, no, it’s fine.  It could be a lot worse, trust me.”  
  
“That doesn’t make it okay.”  
  
“Ed, really, you don’t have to.  I’m fine.  It’s okay.”  Corbett bites his lip again.  “Maggie knows, and she’s cool with it, too.  That’s enough for me.”  
  
Ed frowns, because really, Corbett deserves better than that, especially since…nope, nope, not going there.  That’s not an actual thing.  Not a thing, so it’s not even worth thinking about.  Corbett just…deserves better.  There’s no special reason for that.  
  
Corbett takes a sip of his coffee, looking a little concerned.  “It, um.  It means a lot, that you’d be willing to do that, though.”  
  
“You deserve to feel comfortable on this team, you know?”  Ed very nearly reaches out to touch him.  
  
“Yeah.”  Corbett smiles down at his coffee, just a little.  “But still, thanks.”  
  
Ed nods.  “You’re welcome.”  
  
After that, they’re quiet for a long while.  They finish their coffee, and still, nothing shows up on any of the instruments.  Harry texts Ed again, and this time, he picks up and looks at the text.  
  
_[1:29] Dude this room is hopping, we’ve gotten more EVP than I’ve ever seen.  And Maggie’s Ghost Radar thing is picking up a hell of a lot._  
  
_[2:12] hey, are you okay?  you didn’t respond to the last one.  something happen?_  
  
Ed sighs, and texts back:  
  
_[2:13] no, everything’s quiet here.  corbett made coffee_  
  
It’s only a few seconds before there’s a response:  
  
_[2:14]_   _just for you?  or do the rest of us also get to enjoy?_  
  
Ed refuses to answer that one, tossing his phone down on the table.  Corbett looks at him, one eyebrow raised.  “It’s just Harry being Harry.”  
  
Corbett nods, and he’s starting to look sleepy again.  
  
“You okay?” Ed asks.  
  
“Yeah, I’m good.  I just — keep forgetting, I’ve built up too much of a caffeine tolerance for this to even work.”  He frowns down at his empty mug.  “So I’m still sleepy.”  
  
Ed smiles at him a little.  “Y’know, you can sleep.  I can handle this.”  
  
Corbett shakes his head, smiling.  “No, I’m good.  I’ll manage.”  
  
Within five minutes, he’s asleep again, but he’s listed over sideways, his head on Ed’s shoulder.  Ed looks at him for a long moment, then decides to let him be.  
  
It’s getting harder and harder to ignore this, to pretend that it’s not making his stomach flip over every time Corbett does something like this.  It’s getting harder to ignore that there’s more to the fear than just guilt.  Because Corbett is sleeping on his shoulder, and he looks like he belongs there.  
  
Ed picks up his phone and snaps a picture, It’s dark, and grainy, but both he and Corbett are both visible.  He sends it to Maggie with the caption _somebody fell asleep.  don’t show h._  
  
In a minute or two, she texts back.  
  
_[2:22] omg_  
  
_[2:22] that’s adorable_  
  
Ed huffs a little laugh, careful not to dislodge or wake Corbett.  
  
_[2:24] yeah.  he, uh, didn’t sleep so good last night, apparently_  
  
Maggie shoots back almost immediately.  
  
_[2:24] neither did you_  
  
He’s got to admit that that’s true, but he doesn’t have to say anything in response.  
  
Things are quiet for another twenty minutes, and then Harry texts again.  
  
_[2:45]_   _you’re letting him SLEEP on you?_  
  
Ed closes his eyes, stomach dropping.  Of course.  Of course Harry’s going to find a way to ruin this, even though he doesn’t mean to.  
  
_[2:47] fuck you.  it has nothing to do with you.  and stop stealing maggies phone._  
  
A few minutes later, he gets another message from Harry.  
  
_[2:53] jeez, ed, what’s got your panties in a bunch._  
  
Ed rolls his eyes this time, and replies almost immediately, because even though Corbett doesn’t need him to talk to Harry about this, it’s going to eat at him until he does.  
  
_[2:54] stop being gross about corbett.  it has nothing to do with you, and it makes him uncomfortable, but he’s too nice to say anything._  
  
_[2:55] you make all these comments about him and i’m sick of it._  
  
Corbett shifts a little against him, and now he’s closer, leaning on Ed a little more.  And there are reasons he shouldn’t be doing this, there are reasons he should wake Corbett up, but he’s not going to.  It’s getting hard to remember why he shouldn’t let this happen.  
  
Harry replies.  
  
_[2:57] does it really bother you that much?  i mean, he’s kind of gay, right?_  
  
_[2:58] not that there’s anything wrong with that, i guess._  
  
It makes Ed a little mad, now, and it shows when he texts back.  
  
_[2:59] well you sure act like there is._  
  
He puts the phone down, because he’s done with this conversation.  If Harry wants to say something about it, he’s gonna have to say it to his face.   
  
Instead, he slides his arm around Corbett’s waist again and watches the instruments and the monitors, kind of hoping that something will show, so he’s at least got a distraction from how pissed he is at Harry.  
  
It’s maybe a half hour before Corbett starts to stir.  Ed’s phone has buzzed six more times, and he hasn’t looked at it once.  
  
“Hmm?” Corbett mumbles as he starts to wake.  “What…did I fall asleep again?”  
  
“Yeah,” Ed says, like it’s the most normal thing in the world.  
  
Corbett realizes that he was sleeping on Ed, and he jerks upright.  “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to —“  
  
“It’s okay,” Ed says, looking at him steadily.    
  
“Really?  Even though…?”  Corbett looks so worried, so nervous, and Ed wants to fight something or someone, he doesn’t care what or who.  
  
Instead he just nods.  “Yeah.  It’s no big deal.”  
  
Even if Harry thinks it is, even if Maggie thinks it is.  It’s not.  It was comfortable, and for once Ed wasn’t scared of it.  
  
“Oh.”  This is when Corbett notices the arm around his waist, and he looks at Ed, brow furrowing.  
  
“Didn’t want you to fall over,” Ed explains, taking his arm back.  “Did you sleep okay?”  
  
Corbett nods.  “Yeah.  I slept fine.”    
  
He’s blushing, and Ed bites his lip, looking at him, because now that he’s not thinking about the consequences, he really, really wants to kiss Corbett right now.  
  
But just because Corbett’s gay, that doesn’t mean he’s interested in Ed.  So he doesn’t.  
  
Because why would Corbett be interested in him, anyway?  He doesn’t exactly have much to offer, and he knows he comes off as straight, because he’s tried to.  
  
Corbett leans back against Ed’s shoulder, and murmurs, “Is this okay?”  
  
“Yeah, it’s fine.”  Ed blushes a little himself.    
  
“You — you’ve been really nice to me,” Corbett murmurs, and he’s already half asleep again.  “Thank you for that.”  
  
Ed laughs a little.  “Well, um, you definitely deserve it.”  
  
Corbett smiles, and Ed can feel it against his shoulder.  His heart is thudding against his ribs, and he thinks, well, now or never.  
  
He takes Corbett’s hand, which is on the bench between the two of them.  “Is this okay?” he asks in turn.  
  
Corbett sits up again and stares at him.  “You —?”  
  
“Yeah, me.”  He blushes.  “I mean I like girls, but…”  
  
There’s a moment of quiet.  “So — is that why you were freaking out?”  
  
Ed nods.  “Yeah.  It wasn’t just feeling guilty.”  
  
Corbett swallows, and he lets go of Ed’s hand, getting off the bench.  Ed tries to swallow his disappointment, because of course he was wrong, of course he pushed too far, he always did.  
  
But Corbett just walks up to the camera for this room and closes the lens cover, and then he comes back to the bench.  “I, you, really?”  
  
“Really.”  Ed’s not sure why Corbett wants the camera off for this, but he lowers his voice so the mic won’t pick it up.  “Why’d you close the camera?”  
  
“I figured you wouldn’t really want this recorded,” Corbett murmurs.  “Given, y’know, Harry.”  
  
Ed shakes his head.  “I don’t give a shit about what Harry thinks, at this point.”  
  
“You don’t?”  
  
“I don’t.”  
  
Corbett blinks at him, and he smiles a little.  “So, um.  You like me?”  
  
“Yeah.  Kind of a lot.”  More than he should, really, but he’s stopped caring about that.  He never should’ve cared about that.  
  
“I, um, I like you too.  Kind of a lot.”  Corbett’s whispering, and Ed smiles at him.  
  
It feels good, it feels like all of the uncomfortable nervousness and fear are melting away.  “You do, huh?”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
“Can I kiss you?” Ed asks, carefully.  
  
Corbett nods, blushing bright pink and not saying anything.  
  
So Ed tugs him closer and kisses him, hands in the front of Corbett’s jacket as he does.  Because there may be reasons not to want this, but he wants it anyway.  
  
And he’s kind of tired of searching for the truth and hiding this one.  So he keeps kissing Corbett, and the thrill of adrenaline that goes through him is so much better than the last one.  It’s devoid of fear, and he smiles into the kiss as Corbett wraps his arms around him.  
  
“Kinda wish we got that on tape,” Ed says, grinning, when the kiss ends.  He’s almost delirious with happiness.  
  
“Really?”  
  
“Yeah.”  
  
In the morning, he’s going to have to confront Harry.  In the morning, he’s going to be nervous and anxious, and there’s going to be a lot of words exchanged.  
  
But right now, right now, he doesn’t care about any of that, because he’s got this.  
  
He’s got it, instead of just wanting it. 


End file.
